So, it has been two years already. Who would have thought? Time flew so fast since that day I first saw your profiles.
The first year of my journey with you was probably the “magical era”; like everything that happened actually jumped off from a fairy tale book. It was a time of discovery – of things that concerned the five of you, things you liked, songs you sang, the stages you graced, your personalities. At the same time, it was also a time of discovery within myself – the extent of this newfound love, my limitations as only a watchful eye, the amount of tears I can shed, the smiles I can smile and the birth of a promise to stay and wait.
This year was probably the year that tested that promise. So many things came our way, most of them made us cry. There were only a few droplets of happiness, and these droplets came with a cost. It was a year like those of the “Dark Ages”, where people around you “fall out of love” and die inside. I would not deny that a large part of me died as each day passed, with each day that seemingly tore pages of our story, as the end of the tunnel looked so far away.
But there were also things who kept me hanging on, who held my hands connected to yours.
The existence of what other would call “foolishness”, a language only us knew how to interpret, a thread only us knew how strong, one that is called “devotion”. With this as my inspiration and my fuel, I completely devoted my time to working for the glory of your name, doing things that will make you proud, helping others “bounce back to love” and “fall in love”. I took this story to another level. It channeled all the pain to strength. And slowly, the faith is renewed, the love, reheated.
As I write this letter, another day marks the start of a new year. No one knows what will happen this time. I can’t promise to shed no tears, I can’t promise to smile all the time, because it’s hard to be happy knowing that behind the curtains, our hearts are suffering and we are all longing for something that is currently impossible to happen.
But I’ll just make another promise.
Jaejoong, Yunho, Yoochun, Junsu and Changmin, I promise you this,
Next year, I’ll still share a slice of cake with the people we call home,
I’ll still cry while listening to “You’re My Melody”,
I’ll still get all nostalgic as I watch “Mirotic” MV,
I’ll still broadcast to the world that it’s our anniversary,
I’ll still write another letter,
And make sure that I did things that you’ll be proud of.
I love you. I will forever love you.
My forever love,
You Are My Melody…
Dong Bang Shin Ki